Explaining gay people to my 5 year old.

 

This Story takes place in the late 90s. Little Stan and myself were watching Will and Grace. 

Little Stan : Daddy, why does Jack act like a girl ? 

Me : Because he is queer as a three dollar bill. 

Little Stan: What does that mean? 

Me" Queer means weird and three dollar bills dont exist, so they are really weird. Thats just a funny way of saying Gay. 

Little Stan: What is gay ? 

Me: You know how daddy has girlfriends and your mommy has a husband, well Jack likes other boys like that instead of liking girls. 

Little Stan: Thats gross .... 

Me: Well I agree, but thats what some people like to do. 

 I thought I had explained the situation well enough and my son seemed satisfied with the answer he received and he understood the concept.   or so I thought ............. 

 Soon after we were in a store .. me and my boy. We were walking down the aisle when a very flamboyant gay man walked by. 

 So of course my son looks at me and says in a really loud voice ... 

"daddy, look... Its a three dollar bill" 

I picked up my son and ran away from where the gay man was laughing. 

 This really happened. Of course I had to explain why it was not nice to call them three dollar bills and I probably should never have been entrusted with the raising of a real child at that point in my life. But i thought it was hilarious then and its hilarious now. 

I love my son, he always makes me laugh.