BREAKING: Charlie Kirk resurrected to wed Kyle Rittenhouse! Exclusive to Scott Eats Wood

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Ever since Kyle Rittenhouse learned to spell "college" & threatened us with attending one of those, we've been praying he wouldn't follow through with his threat and that his recent absence from social media isn't a result of the libruls brainwashing him into reading, mathing & chemistrying & other wokism bullshit!

As timely as our Lesbian Lord's period, Kyle announced his marriage yesterday. PRAISE THE LORD!!!



And  the Lesbian Lord also resurrected Charlie Kirk ontime to be the lucky broom, I meant groom. What a great Christian double penetration or what Melabia Trump called "dinner with clients" in the 80s!!!



CONGRATS TO THE TOTALLY NOT GAY COUPLE: CHARLIE KIRK & KYLE RITTENHOUSE!!!

To the Godless libs refusing to believe in the Lord's miracles, we have nothing for you except the tiniest of violin played by our newly wedded & freshly resurrected Charlie Kirk


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